Resolutions are a decision to make a change. But what drives change?
A recent study showed that when doctors tell heart patients they will die if they don’t change their habits, only one in seven will be able to follow through successfully. Desire and motivation are not enough: even when it is literally a matter of death.
According to the authors of ‘Immunity to Change’ by Robert Kegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey our individual beliefs create a natural but powerful immunity to change.
Lahey and Kegan suggest choosing ONE big improvement (personal growth goal).
Let’s look at weight loss. You want to lose weight, but what are you doing instead? They then suggest listing all the benefits, as if you have already achieved your [weight loss] goal. Next list all behaviors you are doing, or not doing that undermine and get in the way of your goal. From these lists, competing behaviors begin to emerge. I call this becoming ‘mindful’. What is the connection to the behavior that keeps you from choosing foods and making lifestyle choices that will support your goal?
To reach your goal, decide what you want – then what you are willing to do – to get what you want and stick to it. Identifying the behaviors that are getting in your way are paramount to your success. You have all read the fine print “before starting any weight loss program, consult with your physician”. I would add, “before starting on any weight loss program, check with your psyche”.
Make the first step of embarking on a lifestyle program (notice I did not say ‘diet’) – the step of observation. Spend a week in total awareness. When do you eat, why do you eat, what emotions make you eat, how do you feel when you eat, what ‘excuses’ do you use for not exercising or reaching for unhealthy food? Write them down, in fact, write in the moment. Carry a journal with you. When you reach for food, stop and write down what you are feeling. This step alone, could be your final ‘resolve’ to making change that sticks for a lifetime.